friskyflamingo:

sqvad:

pansoph:

pansoph:

i went to a party and put 3 whole loaves of sliced bread all around the house i put bread under the kid’s pillow and in all 3 of his bathrooms, in his rugby shorts and the breast pocket of his school shirt, on his roof and his neighbor’s roof, in his couch and on his tv i’m laughing so hard he’s going to wake up hungover tomorrow and be like why the fuck is there bread everywhere 

image

i’m pissing myself

jesus christ

jesus crust 

(via homieosexual)

rninor:

weepingdildo:

landorus:

lets have phone sex over walkie talkies

"I’ll make you moan, over"

"bend over"
"bend what? over"

(via ionlyfollowbadblogs)

follovved:

babedwire:

follovved:

its 2015 and everyone still hates me

It’s 2014

just planning ahead

(Source: straighthater, via uncensored-lives)

sarahjessicapenis:

Does anyone else wonder how hot they would be if if they were born as the other gender?

(via letshuntsomethings)

lsdjupiterqueen:

yall wanna eat ass but dont wanna watch human centipede

(Source: manga7, via uncensored-lives)

sherrocked:

My little sister is a really pretty girl and she gets dick pics all the time from annoying boys, so being the girl she is, she started using them as blackmail.
She now has about 30 boys doing her bidding because one stepped out of line and she got someone to print out 500 copies of the photo and mailed it to his family.

My sister is 16 and she’s running a black mail Mafia.
She’s going places.

(Source: amovible, via itsnotenoughtowant)

im in love with yours ^_^